My girlfriend is not rough enough with me

I'm a straight guy who constantly fantasizes about having my girlfriend be aggressive with me. I want her to be mad at me, scream at me, insult me and treat me like her sex toy. I want her to tell me how disgusting I am and how I don't deserve her. I want her to tie me to the bed, play with my ass and spank me. Whenever her hand touches my neck I get so horny thinking about how she could choke me. Sometimes in the morning I just lie in bed next to her waiting for her to wake up and give me permission to start my day. I am so addicted to this girl, she could do whatever she wanted with me. She could break my heart in a thousand pieces and I would still love her.

Luckily our relationship is very healthy because if she was very abusive I could definitely take it and ruin my mental health for her. I still have this longing. Today I want to go to a sex shop with her and tell her how I want her to torture me.